Single women sometimes choose to be single. Ever thought of that?
People think that because a woman’s single, she must be bad at dating. They think they’re being helpful by pointing out flaws, or suggesting things to try to fix ‘the problem.’ Have they ever considered there is no problem. That you’re happy being single for the moment. Maybe your last relationship ended in disaster and you need a little break before heading back into the dating scene. Maybe you’re focusing on your career right now. There’s plenty of reason single women choose to skip relationships. Just expect your friends and family to think something’s wrong if you do choose to take yourself off the market. And expect plenty of people getting all up in your business about it. Here’s the last things you want to hear when you’re single.
1. YOU NEED TO TRY HARDER.
What do you mean I have to try and find love? It doesn’t just fall in your lap when you turn 25? C’mon people! I’ll meet someone when I’m ready, on my own terms. Thank you very much!
2. I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY SUCH A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LIKE YOU IS SINGLE.
Are you saying my best quality is my looks? Um … thanks, I guess? There’s plenty more to a woman than just looks and people need to understand that or keep their mouths shut!
3. YOU’RE BETTER OFF WITHOUT HIM.
As true as that might be, this statement is just a veiled way of saying: “Great, you screwed up another relationship!” OK, so I’m better off without him. Now go away!
4. I’VE GOT THE PERFECT GUY FOR YOU.
Stop right there! As good as you think he is, I’m not interested in your charity hookup. The only reason people set other people up is because they think they’re flawed in some way and need help. No thank you! If I want your help, I’ll ask for it.
5. AREN’T YOU LONELY?
Being alone doesn’t make me lonely. I still have friends, family, and colleagues to fill my social calendar when I want to. Keep asking me questions like this and I might have one less friend! Actually, being single allows for way more socializing opportunities than being in a relationship does. So, there’s that.
6. YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE MISSING.
What?!?! Of course I know what I’m missing, which is why I’m single right now! I spent last night eating pizza in my jammies and drinking wine from a box. What did you do last night? Oh, you had a fight with your BF over what shows you were going to watch? Nice.
7. ARE YOU TRYING TO MEET GUYS?
I’ve never thought about that! That would take effort on my part though, and I’m not sure I’m ready to commit to that right now. I’m kind of focusing on me at the moment. Check back with me in a year though, OK?
8. DON’T YOU WANT BABIES?
You know I don’t need to be in a relationship to have a baby, right? Besides, have you ever considered that I might not want kids? Single women don’t have to want kids. Why don’t you live your life and I’ll live mine. Does that sound doable for you?
9. YOU SHOULD LOWER YOUR STANDARDS.
Do you even know my standards? And is it that bad if I choose to wait for a guy that is worthy of me? A real friend wouldn’t be rushing me into something like this. They’d be supportive of my decision to wait for the right guy.
10. I FEEL SO SORRY FOR YOU.
Now that’s just rude! Why feel sorry for me? I’m happy and life is good right now, even if I’m single (more likely because I’m single!). Yes, there’s probably someone out there who’d make me much happier, but that doesn’t make what’s going on in my life now any less valuable. Happiness isn’t dependent upon being in a relationship! Single women, don’t take this from anyone!!
11. YOU SHOULD DRESS UP A LITTLE MORE.
Thanks for telling me I look like crap! Now you’re insulting my fashion sense as well as my romantic life? Why don’t I just go out and drop a couple grand on a new wardrobe. Will that make you happy? GTFO!
12. I WISH I WAS STILL SINGLE.
Jealous much?! Just last week you were trying to give me advice and set me up on blind dates! Now you want to be single too? Don’t hate! Single women don’t need this emotional back and forth.
13. I WAS ALREADY MARRIED AT YOUR AGE.
Wow, thanks for calling me old! Single women don’t age, BTW. I’m happy that your story is a fairy tale with a happy ending. Listen, there’s no expiration date stamped on my ass. I’ll find a relationship and get married if and when I’m ready!
14. THERE’S PLENTY OF GOOD GUYS OUT THERE.
Oh yeah? Can you set me up with one a night for the next year? I’m not looking for plenty of good guys, I just need one. And not right now, when I decide the time is right. OK?
15. WHY ARE YOU SINGLE?
Why do you care? What does it mean to you? If you’re concerned because you honestly think I’d be happier with someone, thank you. But, really, I’m fine. Single women aren’t as frail as you think.
16. IF YOU PRAY ABOUT IT, YOU’LL FIND SOMEONE.
Well I prayed for world peace, a cure for cancer, and a bunch of money, and guess what …? Prayer isn’t a magic cure all. If it were, my prayer that people would stay out of my love life would’ve worked and we wouldn’t be having this stupid conversation right now.
17. MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY A COUPLE MORE DATING SITES.
More than the 20 I’ve already tried? The only one left is Farmer’s Only, and I don’t even own livestock! Isn’t there some auction I could put myself in and just hope for the best? Guess what? I have better things to do than spend all day on the computer trying to find the one decent guy on Tinder.
18. I BET YOU’RE SAVING SO MUCH MONEY.
Research shows that people in relationships tend to spend more money. But I still have financial responsibilities to take care of, and that’s all on me. Sure splitting rent and food and such is cheaper, but way less satisfying than making it on your own. Stay out of my finances and my love life!
19. MAYBE YOU’VE ALREADY MET THE ONE.
And maybe you have a time machine for me to go back to be sure. If you’re suggesting that ‘the one’ is one of my exes than we’re done here. I’m not with them for reasons you don’t need to know about. Don’t you worry about it!
20. YOU SHOULD BE A LITTLE MORE SLUTTY.
Are you kidding me!?! Suggesting I should loosen my values to land a guy is disgusting. I’m not going to start sleeping with guys on the first date hoping they’ll call me for another. Besides, I’ve got hookups lined up if I want sex! 😉 Single women, I’m sure you agree.
How should you deal with all this tired and unwanted advice? Roll your shoulders, shoot them a look, and just walk away.